“A woman resting is a rare sight. Growing up, I never saw my mother at leisure. Her days were (still are) filled with endless tasks, her moments of rest fleeting,” shares an Instagram user and artist, Imdad Barbhuyan in his post. He writes how he tried creating images of his mother relaxing by asking her to lie down and close her eyes. “And naturally,” he says,“she fell asleep in a minute or two.” Barbhuyan shares how before clicking a few pictures,he let her sleep in that moment and looked at her in adoration. “I saw a beautiful vulnerability, her tireless dedication coming to a momentary pause,” he shares.
Similarly, another artist, Jayanti Bose, in her Women at Leisure series on Instagram, showcases what it would be like for women if their time were not dictated to them. Her women are depicted flying kites, chit-chatting over a cutting chai, pulling together the courage to pick up the brush and paint for the first time, indulging in a game of football, helping each other drape the saree, and having an indoor mehfil with Tablas and Tagore’s songs.
But what is leisure? Can you really define it? Now, if we were to imagine the same as the above-explained images of women for men, wouldwe feel and embrace it with the same joy? No, perhaps because unlike women, men’s leisure time has always been about being an earned one, the one where they assert their right to indulge in leisure time. It is women, who have to justify their time and even have to ask for it. They are even reprimanded for it. Time, therefore, works differently for men and women.
Surabhi Yadav from India, who runs a project called Basanti: Women at Leisure on Instagram, knows this difference. She knows how rare it is for women to find, collect, and save some time for themselves; and how important it is to educate other women about leisure, especially to women from marginal communities. Through her photographs and words on her social media handle, Yadav documents Indian women (across socio-economic backgrounds) at leisure. She posts photos and videos of women enjoying the sea waves, taking a dip in the river, climbing trees,taking bike rides, swinging under a tree without a care in the world, or just introspecting and having some time alone. A part of the reason why this account of hers gets so much traction, even from international users, is because the users can relate and vicariously feel the joy these women feel when they “selflessly choose” to take time out for themselves and the sheer rarity of these moments.
Leisure time does not come easy to women. Period. A study based on global data from 33 countries suggests that women spend three times more time in unpaid care work than men. Today,more women are working as employees than ever, but they are doing two jobs (or multiple). The Second Shift, as Arlie Hochschild explains in her book, “working women” and employed mothers bear most of the brunt of domestic duties at home where the unpaid household duties in the forms of physical, mental, and emotional labor do not leave their side.
And this is why despite all these challenges, when women choose to take charge of their time and indulge they resist the very structures that thrive on their labor and the very act of them being immersed in leisure becomes an act of resistance. Take, for instance, the case of South Asian women and kitty parties; how they often find freedom, comfort, support, agency and mind space through these gatherings; how they resist their familial challenges and atrocities through the sisterhood community they find in these parties.Women have shared how the networks and funds in Kitty Parties helped them get a job, start a new business, and even saved them from toxic marriages by giving them financial freedom.Through Kitty Parties, women build a fund for their own personal leisure -a concept which although operated within the patriarchal boundaries of society,simultaneously empowers women to take charge of their money and time.
Nevertheless, as Yadav, Barbhuyan, and Bose express, when women dare to carve out moments of leisure, they do not merely take a break—they reclaim their identity and agency. In these precious moments, whether it’s a stolen afternoon nap or a boisterous gathering with friends, women challenge the deeply ingrained societal norms that have long confined them to roles of relentless service and sacrifice. By choosing leisure, they do not only resist the structures that seek to limit their freedom; they redefine what it means to be a woman in today’s world that is largely defined by men. These acts of self-care and self-prioritization become powerful declarations of autonomy, reminding everyone that a woman’s value extends far beyond her labor. Through the simple yet radical act of indulging in leisure time, women assert their right to exist for themselves, to be seen and heard in their fullness, and to live life on their own terms. This is not just a fleeting respite; it is a profound act of resistance and liberation.
